The Lobster

Utterly moronic. Wincingly earnest and stupid at the same time. Phony, arbitrary - built on one dimensional, sadomasochistic hierarchies usually reserved for the worst sci-fi. Internal logic? How the **** can an internal logic be the critique of an external reality, when the author presumes a fictional reality so stilted, laconic and one dimensional that it beggars belief? An utter misread of the culture he intends to critique. Lower production values and worse acting, and we might have been graced with another Plan 9. And beware of 'consciously' wooden writing and directing. It usually means the offending parties can neither write nor direct. A nominee for the Heaven's Gate of art films. What a stinker! Wow!

A dystopia where the most chilling aspects are the ones drawn from the most banal features of contemporary life--bland architecture, casual consumerism, rote relationships. Based on an absurd premise but true to its internal logic--relentlessly so. Not all the laugh lines land and it's hard to tell at times where satire ends and earnest sociopathy begins, but it's definitely an excellent first date litmus test that will provide ample fodder for after-movie conversation. Maybe it drags a bit in the middle but it's worth it for the many profoundly funny bits I won't spoil here. Not sure I'd re-watch any time soon but I'll be mulling over what I saw. Bizarre deadpan script, compelling performances, and beautifully shot.

I give it 4 out of 5 claws.

I recognize that this is supposed to be a social commentary of some kind and a parody, but it is a bad one, and not at all profound or intelligent. I started double-tabbing halfway through this unbelievably long film. There was not one laugh. It's sort of watered-down Lars Von Trier. For a better contemporary European comedy, try Number One Fan.